Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
