But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
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You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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