lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
