Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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