Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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