I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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