Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
home. puking in laundry basket.
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I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
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