What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize