Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
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This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
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Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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