Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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