i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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