White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
