So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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