Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
