YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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