Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
