Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
