Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I had to cum in my sink.
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