so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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