And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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