Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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