Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
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