adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
