Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize