So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Randomize
