I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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