We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
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