But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
