If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Randomize
