If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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