I hate all girls vehemently.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Oh god it's open bar.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
