the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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