I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
