i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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