My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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