Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
you are hot. that is all.
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
