sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
