sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
