I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
