so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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