my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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