just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
