Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Randomize
