with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
last night I used snow as a chaser
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I think we might need a safe word for this...
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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