We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Randomize
