Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Actions speak louder than pants.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
