now i know why i became what i already was.
accomplished twins. life is a go
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
