You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
