belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
