You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
