would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
