Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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